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Video The Try Guys Raise Toddlers For A Day • Fatherhood: Part 3

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18:27   |   12M+ views   |   09/20/2018 at 20:11

Transcription

  • (child yelling)
  • - It changes you.
  • - [Ned] Don't you punch my weiner!
  • (children yelling)
  • - I am so overwhelmed.
  • (laughing)
  • (lively jazz music)
  • We're here, we're doing it, today we're raising kids!
  • - So I'm gonna be raising someone else's child for a day.
  • - Oh, good luck.
  • (laughing) - I don't know what to think.
  • - You're not qualified.
  • (laughs)
  • - So what was I like as a toddler?
  • - Complete pain in the ass.
  • - [Eugene's Dad] You were daydreaming every day.
  • - When you were two and you were three,
  • you were really strong-willed.
  • - Me and my wife are pretty close to having children.
  • - I'm still not so good at taking care of myself.
  • - I'm not the most fond of babies.
  • - It'll be fun, I'm a boy, I get along with boys.
  • I mean look at all these toys.
  • We're gonna have a great time.
  • (crying) - Uh-oh.
  • - It's tiring.
  • - You're losing sleep.
  • - Every day is new.
  • - It's like having a tornado for a pet.
  • - There he goes. - I have to go for that one.
  • - It's like taking care of your drunk friend.
  • - My name is David, I have a 14-month-old son Isadore.
  • - You're a rockst-- ow!
  • - Anything that he is not supposed to get, he wants.
  • - Hey, what did you just find on this?
  • Yeah, not good, dude.
  • Dominik is 22 months, just turned it.
  • - Oh it's in his, it's in his mouth.
  • (laughing)
  • Just really going at it, just really chewing it.
  • - This is a two-year-old.
  • - Woah, woah, woah, hey, hey!
  • - Good catch!
  • Better dad than me.
  • So this is Oskar, and then I have a 7-week-old at home.
  • He did say at one point he wanted to throw him
  • in the trash can.
  • (screaming, crying)
  • - Dex, don't take a book from a baby sweetheart,
  • for what I consider to be obvious reasons.
  • (yells)
  • - So this is your life?
  • - This is Odysseus, he's one, Ajax is four,
  • and Rex is six, six and a half.
  • - What's it like to be a dad?
  • - It's constantly-- (baby screams)
  • Constant chaos.
  • - When you have a kid, you sign up for stress.
  • - As soon as they get to like, 10 months, that's
  • when they start crawling, and that's crazy town.
  • - He's like a wild little beast.
  • (children yelling)
  • - Yeah.
  • - I couldn't get anything done with these three.
  • - You don't get anything done!
  • I mean you go to sleep at 1:30 or 2:00, you get up at 5:30.
  • You've seen me, you know me.
  • How do I get, I don't know?
  • - So I'm gonna, I guess sort of reverse Asian this
  • and be the adoptive father?
  • - Hello Oskar, I'm Ned.
  • - So I'm your dad now.
  • - I'll be hanging out with you today.
  • Does that sound like a good time?
  • - Uh-uh.
  • - No.
  • - You're not gonna like, throw up on me, are ya?
  • - Dominik, come here! - Dom, wait, Dom, come back.
  • - Dragging the baby was never in any of my parenting books.
  • - (chuckling) He's tripped six times in the last ten steps.
  • (humming)
  • - Do you think Ned's boring?
  • (laughing)
  • - (laughing) There he goes again!
  • - Do children often try to just get away?
  • - That one does, yeah.
  • (laughing)
  • - Now why doesn't Ned try to tickle?
  • (laughing)
  • - Fetch!
  • - Alright, well, it looks like you have
  • your work cut out for you, Ned.
  • - Is it rude for me to say I want out?
  • - Do you think I'm gonna do well?
  • - Uhh, wouldn't say.
  • (laughs)
  • - It's daddy time!
  • My main goal today is just to make sure
  • that the kid doesn't die.
  • - Make sure nobody chokes to death.
  • I've never choked to death, so I'm an expert.
  • - My strengths today are
  • I've got a lot of energy, I'm ready to go,
  • and my weaknesses are I don't know anything.
  • - Hello!
  • - I'll knock.
  • - Hey! - Hello!
  • - Can you say hi to Ned?
  • - Hi, Ned.
  • - This is your domain, you can be daddy now.
  • - I am daddy.
  • - You basically just keep him alive.
  • - He needs a change, this is what he wore to sleep.
  • - Hopefully I don't (bleep) this up.
  • - He does repeat things, so watch out.
  • - Okay.
  • - Good luck. - Thank you.
  • - You're a dad to me, I will be in the other room.
  • Boys, entertain him!
  • - I will, um, figure out what to do with you, Dom.
  • - Where's daddy?
  • - Oh, see, already hates me.
  • Already doesn't wanna stay with me.
  • Off to a great start.
  • Oh, I should take care of this kid, alright,
  • (bleep) ouch.
  • Oh, (bleep)!
  • Oh my god I keep saying it!
  • (laughing)
  • Okay, I'm not gonna, whoo!
  • - I was the youngest of three boys,
  • but I've never dealt with the chaos
  • that was my own childhood dynamic.
  • - Alright, I'm your dad today.
  • Could we put down the screen, Ajax?
  • - He still isn't of the age where you can reason with him.
  • - Dom, where'd you go?
  • - Hey, Ajax, Ajax!
  • - Dom!
  • - Your dad's, I'm your dad now, and screen time's over,
  • I don't know where you're going.
  • - Okay lets, do you take your own shirt off?
  • Or, do you want me to help you or what?
  • - Book.
  • - Butts?
  • - Dom, wait for me.
  • Dom, Dom, Dom.
  • - Ajax, where are you at?
  • Ajax, we don't need the cupcake tin.
  • What, here, why are you opening this?
  • - Underwear goes off, okay.
  • And now we got Star Wars.
  • Oh, can't run around naked!
  • - Hit this, not me.
  • No, no, not me!
  • (clattering)
  • - I'm gonna eat.
  • - You okay over there Ajax?
  • - Follow me.
  • (clicks tongue)
  • Oh wait, no, that's what you do to a dog.
  • - [Ari] Alright, baby's up, let's go meet that baby.
  • - The baby's awake?
  • It's time to add another child to this
  • because I'm in too much control!
  • I need to go take care of your brother.
  • And then, can you guys, do you guys wanna
  • Should we give them a screen for a minute?
  • What do you do?
  • You got five minutes of screen time, how's that sound?
  • - Great!
  • - Try not to kill each other while I'm gone.
  • - We're gonna kill each other?
  • - Yeah, don't.
  • - Why?
  • - I feel like that's a pretty obvious reason.
  • Hey, who's this?
  • It's a stranger!
  • Good morning, Otis!
  • What are you wearing?
  • You are too adorable.
  • He's killing it with those blue squares.
  • - When you have kids, your whole life changes dramatically,
  • especially the first one.
  • - Oh, Otis, you do not smell the best.
  • - I've got my day job, so a lot of days I'm just not home.
  • - Three, two, one, up we go!
  • - So those nights where I am home
  • were nights where she works, then the sort of understanding
  • is I will try to do everything then.
  • - Hi boys, how you doing?
  • I got a third boy for ya.
  • Oh no?
  • What do you mean, oh no?
  • He's trouble?
  • (baby cooing)
  • - I mean I have all these advantages and it's hard as hell.
  • I've got a wife who's a great partner,
  • I've got a good job, my kids are healthy,
  • and it's super, super, super hard.
  • - Look at him dance!
  • Hey guys, look at him dance!
  • (chuckles)
  • - Given that, how dare I not at least
  • do my best at this?
  • - Ajax--
  • (dramatic music)
  • - Hey, hey, hey guys!
  • Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
  • Both of you, hey, guys, guys!
  • Hey, Rex!
  • Can you guys both apologize to each other
  • for hitting each other?
  • You can, you can.
  • - Not everything's a teachable moment,
  • that's the other thing.
  • And that's taken me three kids and six years to figure out.
  • - Are we chill?
  • Hey, give me that screen.
  • What are you doing--
  • (blowing raspberry)
  • - How do I get him to like me?
  • - [David] The way you would want to get anyone to like you.
  • - I'm still trying to figure that out.
  • - Dom, do you wanna play with chalk?
  • Okay, I think he understood what I said.
  • - He's happy unless he cries, right?
  • - [David] I mean, he can get stoked.
  • - Yeah, throw things!
  • - We're gonna make something to eat.
  • I don't even know where to start.
  • (baby yells)
  • Yeah!
  • Man I really regret taking you out of the seat.
  • - [Ned] You're doing a great job unpacking.
  • Uh-oh.
  • - Yeah!
  • (bleep) that guy--Oh, man.
  • I'm sorry, you didn't hear that.
  • - Oh, man!
  • - I know, oh man, see,
  • he retained the second part of that sentence.
  • - Hey Izzy, you wanna go fast?
  • You wanna go whee?
  • Whee!
  • Little bit of a whiplash, there, you're good, though.
  • (making eating noises)
  • (baby talking) (gasp)
  • - Normally I think quiet babies are not
  • that cute, but this one's really cute.
  • Congratulations!
  • - I think he's getting the hang of it.
  • - Whee!
  • - Please Dom, have mercy! Ahh, no!
  • (laughs)
  • - And now the ultimate challenge of the dad,
  • using an oven while holding a baby.
  • (making noises, laughing)
  • - Just everything's a game.
  • Ahh!
  • - Get a little eyeshadow.
  • Oh no, no, don't actually do it, though.
  • - No, no, no, no
  • - They have a tendency to put everything in his mouth.
  • - [Zach] No, no, no, no.
  • - Are kids allowed to eat chalk?
  • Probably not, okay.
  • Let's take that off.
  • Oh yeah, lets spit that out, spit that out.
  • - We can't just eat flour.
  • - We're not!
  • - You were!
  • - Now he's eating a pencil.
  • - So we're almost halfway through this day,
  • and Oskar and I still aren't really connecting.
  • Do you wanna walk around the kitchen with me?
  • (singing)
  • So what was I like as a child?
  • - You weren't verbal at all in the beginning.
  • (grunting)
  • - Do you know how to play the guitar?
  • (strums guitar, sings)
  • What more do you want?
  • How do you know when you're ready to have kids?
  • - You're never ready.
  • - Gotta use your feet!
  • Alright.
  • - It tests the relationship like no other.
  • - I think my wife and I are pretty good
  • at communicating, but--
  • - It's next level.
  • - I promised Ariel that I'd get him to love me
  • by the end of the day, so I gotta.
  • Oh, yeah!
  • Bounce house, bounce house!
  • - My relationship with my wife is 50/50 in terms of
  • the responsibilities we share because I feel like--
  • (laughing)
  • - He just blew your dick up!
  • Oh, god!
  • - This is really fun, but I'm noticing
  • that it's very hot outside, and uh--
  • (Isadore yells)
  • - Alright here we go, yeah!
  • - How do you get him to be still or quiet?
  • - You don't!
  • - Whoo!
  • - A lot of lifting, okay.
  • Whoo!
  • - It started out calm, I called Rex out
  • on his cheating, and then we started robbing the bank.
  • - Let's have a money party!
  • - Alright, money party, let's do it.
  • - Oskar, Oskar!
  • - Whee!
  • - It's a lot about, just kind of keeping things moving.
  • - Ahh!
  • - You're gonna break it, you don't wanna break your game.
  • It was a trap!
  • (yelling)
  • - Dom!
  • (Dominik screams)
  • - No let's maybe not do money party again,
  • we just got rid of money party.
  • We were so close!
  • We were so close!
  • (yelling)
  • (children's toy playing song)
  • - Food?
  • Nom nom?
  • Banana?
  • - Alright guys, it's time for lunch,
  • so screen time is done.
  • - Ready for na na Dom?
  • - Na na!
  • - Yeah, no, he does love food.
  • - Give me one second.
  • - If we gave this to him, he's eaten the whole--
  • - rind? - yes.
  • - This is fun, I like watching him
  • figure out where his mouth is.
  • - I think what's really interesting about this stage
  • is the notion of no.
  • - Guys, hey guys!
  • - Are you done?
  • That's a smart kid.
  • - He's gonna kind of like, start presenting
  • you all these alternatives.
  • - Wanna turn it back on?
  • Thank you.
  • - The reason why it's terrible twos
  • is 'cause they're gonna challenge your authority
  • and see how far they can push it.
  • - Wait a second.
  • - Na na?
  • - No, no.
  • That's it.
  • That's it for today.
  • No more na na.
  • - Oskar, I'm still in the bounce house.
  • - And sometimes he'll just give it right back
  • to me and say no!
  • - No!
  • - No na na.
  • No more na-- (Dominik yells)
  • - As a dad you have to let them know
  • that you're in charge.
  • You can't let them run over you.
  • - Oskar, that's enough.
  • We're either bouncing, or not bouncing!
  • - Then what?
  • - Have you read Revelation?
  • - Ajax.
  • - It's okay, shh.
  • - I don't like that!
  • - Oh, oh.
  • - Alright, that's it.
  • Young man, there's no more bounce house today.
  • - Thanks, buddy.
  • Guys, hey!
  • Hey!
  • No!
  • (crying)
  • It's okay.
  • - It's over.
  • It's just a house now.
  • There's no bounce in it anymore.
  • Okay, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to raise my voice.
  • It's okay.
  • It's alright, you gotta put your shoes back on.
  • (crying)
  • - Oh, boy.
  • - Really crying it out right now.
  • (crying)
  • - Mommy!
  • - I feel like I've messed up.
  • - You okay Oskar?
  • - The more you do it, then you understand
  • how to navigate these types of scenarios.
  • - Okay, let's get him to bed.
  • Let's get him to bed.
  • Turn off the light.
  • Yeah.
  • - You guys really lather on that ketchup.
  • - We love ketchup.
  • - I think most kids do.
  • - Yeah!
  • Yeah!
  • - Yeah!
  • - It's okay.
  • - I give myself a D.
  • - I'll give you a C, but if you wake him up again,
  • you get an F.
  • - Also, when we need to have a song
  • called We Like Book.
  • - We Like Book?
  • - Yeah.
  • - Well I'd love to hear it.
  • - (singing) We like book, book,
  • we like book, book
  • we like book, book all day!
  • We like book, book
  • we like book, book
  • We like book, book all day!
  • Now, and that's the end.
  • - I'm actually kinda glad that's the end.
  • - I think probably the importance of nap time
  • is more for the parents than for the child.
  • (laughing)
  • - Your kid uses diapers still.
  • - Yes, he's 14 months.
  • - Well, I don't know.
  • - You just wanna determine, what do you think?
  • Is there something there?
  • - Oh, that's a poo!
  • (laughs)
  • - Did I ever have like any really gnarly poops?
  • - To this day you still do.
  • (laughs)
  • - That's a big one.
  • - It's a big one.
  • - It got up to your leg.
  • How did that happen?
  • You had an office job before you had him.
  • - I mean, I worked at Buzzfeed.
  • You can't be wimpy about this.
  • You know, it's a demanding job.
  • You don't wipe up, because you don't wanna put it in his--
  • - In his penis, okay.
  • - I mean my grandfather changed one diaper, four kids.
  • - In his entire life?
  • - In his entire life.
  • You're being real delicate.
  • - Well he's a delicate babe!
  • - And I don't wanna be that kind of person.
  • - No, it's like this?
  • - I wanted to figure out a way to put Isadore
  • in the center of my world.
  • (Isadore singing)
  • - I think he's saying wrap this up!
  • - I love him so much, that he sort of put me
  • in a totally different mindset
  • than I even thought I was capable of.
  • (Zach making noises)
  • - Oh, I need to wash my hands.
  • Okay.
  • (laughing)
  • Let's go!
  • - The best thing that I can offer him is myself.
  • - Woohoo!
  • - Nothing beats the real thing.
  • - Oh, boys!
  • Y'all wanna go outside?
  • Aww, yeah!
  • Aww, yeah!
  • - The thing is, you actually put the kid
  • in there first, and then you strap on all that other stuff.
  • - Biscuits!
  • - Get it, flip it!
  • Flip it, yeah!
  • That was awesome!
  • - Yo, it's time for popsicles.
  • (laughing)
  • - Run, run, run!
  • - Whoo!
  • - Why are these people waving at me?
  • Is this what it's like having a baby?
  • Everyone just loves you?
  • - And just, let it go.
  • Feels good, feels good.
  • - What are you doing?
  • How'd you get our camera bag?
  • Get it out of your mouth!
  • That's disgusting.
  • - He has discovered stairs.
  • You are just constantly finding danger, aren't you?
  • - Also, you know, I don't really like babies very much.
  • - Okay, well maybe a little gentler.
  • - Do you have any advice for how to try to connect
  • with a little kid?
  • - Act like you are a two-year-old.
  • - What does monkey say?
  • (monkey grunting)
  • - He loves monkeys, so I'm gonna become a monkey.
  • - Monkey?
  • (laughs)
  • (making noises)
  • - What does the zebra say?
  • - Zebra!
  • - Wow. - Yeah.
  • - We're trying to learn - That's exactly
  • - to teach him that one - what a zebra says.
  • - A couple of crazy things happened
  • that let surrogacy happen in my life.
  • - How far does this go down?
  • (laughs)
  • - That's too much!
  • - I actually co-parent him with
  • a friend of mine, who's his bio-mom.
  • - Gotcha.
  • - She's married to another woman.
  • So gay dude dad, lesbian mom!
  • - [Eugene] That explains all the denim.
  • (laughs)
  • - I didn't say that, you did!
  • - This is a really bumpy sidewalk.
  • This is off-roading basically.
  • Jeez, alright.
  • - I knew that there would be a huge hole in my life
  • if I hadn't gone through this experience.
  • - I've only been with him for several hours
  • and I'm already exhausted.
  • Whee!
  • - No, no, no, dog poop!
  • - Welcome to daddy's world.
  • All those stereotypes about a love that you
  • never felt before is totally there.
  • What, oh my gosh.
  • Okay, okay you're really milking this right now, baby.
  • - Woah!
  • - Do you feel like, I dunno,
  • more comfortable doing this now?
  • - I understand him more, but the idea
  • that your job is never done, I think
  • that's something I will never fully appreciate
  • until I'm in it.
  • 'Cause how could you?
  • - I always thought about having kids,
  • but I think I'm less, I'm realizing
  • that I'm less terrified of kids,
  • and maybe more terrified of being a bad dad.
  • I'm always thinking like,
  • maybe if I had a kid, I would kind of
  • make it a little F-U-C-K-E-D up, you know?
  • Like it would be maybe too much like me in some ways.
  • - You will probably feel uniquely unqualified
  • to do this, and you are, but so am I.
  • And I actually do this.
  • - You're never gonna be the person
  • that you're supposed to be until the end of it.
  • And then partly, he will help shape
  • the person who you become.
  • - So, just try your best, huh?
  • - [David] That's basically it.
  • - What I learned today, it's pretty much chaos all the time.
  • Ajax is all the way over there, spinning a barrel.
  • - I am so tired.
  • (sighs)
  • - That's like without-kid tired.
  • That is not the same.
  • - I need to take a nap now.
  • - I don't know how my parents did it.
  • - There are certainly single dads out there,
  • and I don't know how they do it.
  • - It's a lot.
  • - You gotta be active in this thing, too.
  • - If you're gonna go through the process
  • of making a kid, you gotta show up.
  • - Well cheers, here's to dad.
  • - Cheers, cheer dads everywhere.
  • - I'm drinking wine out of a sippy cup.
  • - But it's worth it?
  • - Oh, yeah.
  • - I'll be honest, this is pretty fun.
  • - I love to climb.
  • - Also, it smells like ketchup in here.
  • - Someday, I'll have kids.
  • - Was I a good dad?
  • Don't laugh if I wasn't a good dad.
  • - Oh, oh!
  • - You didn't put the top on?
  • (crying)
  • - Not today, see you later, kids!
  • Goodbye!
  • - [Ari] You did great.
  • - Any time the camera wasn't rolling,
  • something like this was happening.
  • So, just rest assured I've never been (mumbling)
  • - But one piece of advice in order to have kids
  • that I've found is, it helps to have sex.
  • - Well, yeah, okay, that's a rude way to end this day.
  • (laughs)
  • - (whispering) Bye-bye.

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Description

Boys, boys, boys. The Try Guys tackle the terrible twos and attempt to raise unruly toddlers for a day. The third in a special five-part series exploring fatherhood.

Credits: https://www.buzzfeed.com/bfmp/videos/17053

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Eye Of The Frank
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Clumsy And Awkward_Main
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The Chase Is On_Main
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Standing Rock_fullmix
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Savoir Faire_Main
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The Times They Are A Cha Cha Cha_Main
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Rise And Shine_NoLdVox.aif
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Rise And Shine.aif
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Mr Jeeves
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Thats Life
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Tyrex Tracking_Main
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Dwarfs On Speed_fullmix
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Blue Danube Waltz_V1
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Anthem_Instrumental
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Ball Hard_Full Mix
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Serenade No 13 G Major Kv 525 Little E

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