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Video Weekend Update on Michael Cohen Raid - SNL

TheTV.info
03:09   |   1M+ views   |   today at 03:01

Transcription

  • >>> IT'S "WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE.
  • >> GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE. WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE."
  • I'M COLIN JOST. >> I'M MICHAEL CHE.
  • WELL, DONALD TRUMP HAD A PRETTY TOUGH WEEK, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
  • I THINK I'M STILL GOING TO MAKE FUN OF HIM.
  • [ LAUGHTER ] THE FBI RAIDED THE HOME, OFFICE
  • AND HOTEL ROOM OF PRESIDENT TRUMP'S PERSONAL LAWYER,
  • MICHAEL COHEN, THIS WEEK. AUTHORITIES FIRST BECAME
  • SUSPICIOUS OF COHEN WHEN THEY FOUND OUT HE WAS THE LAWYER FOR
  • DONALD TRUMP. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • THIS DOES NOT LOOK GOOD FOR TRUMP.
  • IF BEING BLACK HAS TAUGHT ME ANYTHING, IT'S THAT WHEN THE
  • FEDS COME KICKING IN YOUR DOOR, THEY GOT SOMETHING.
  • [ LAUGHTER ] FBI RAIDS ARE LIKE WHEN YOUR
  • GIRL GOES THROUGH YOUR PHONE. SHE'S ONLY DOING IT TO CONFIRM
  • WHAT SHE ALREADY KNOWS. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • >> THIS MICHAEL COHEN RAID IS BEING CALLED HISTORIC AND IT'S
  • AMAZING HOW WE KEEP HEARING "HISTORIC" IN REFERENCE TO
  • THINGS THAT HAPPEN DURING TRUMP'S ADMINISTRATION, AND NONE
  • OF THEM ARE POSITIVE. HISTORIC HAS BECOME A POLITE WAY
  • OF SAYING, "UNBELIEVABLY TERRIBLE."
  • LIKE WOW, THE CLEVELAND BROWNS ARE HAVING ANOTHER HISTORIC
  • SEASON. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • OR WALKING OUT OF THE BATHROOM AND SAY, YOU BETTER GIVE IT A
  • MINUTE, I JUST DID SOMETHING HISTORIC.
  • [ LAUGHTER ] >> PRESIDENT TRUMP ORDERED AN
  • AIR STRIKE ON SYRIA FRIDAY NIGHT SO I GUESS WE'RE AT WAR NOW TOO,
  • YAY! THESE TRUMP STORIES SOAR RANDOM
  • SKIN SANE, I FEEL LIKE A CONTESTANT ON "CHOPPED."
  • "WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THESE INGREDIENTS?"
  • [ LAUGHTER ] I MEAN, I KNEW HE WAS GOING TO
  • TRY TO CREATE A DISTRACTION, BUT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE SOMETHING
  • SMALL LIKE TWEETING THE "N" WORD AT TRISTAN THOMPSON.
  • I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS GOING TO PUT US IN A FULL WAR.
  • [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] PLUS ISN'T HE GOING TO JAIL
  • SOON? HE SHOULDN'T BE SIGNING US UP
  • FOR STUFF, HE SHOULD BE KISSING US ON THE FOREHEAD AND TELL US
  • TO TAKE CARE OF MOMMY. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • >> IN HIS MEMOIR "A HIGHER LOYALTY," JAMES COMEY CALLS
  • PRESIDENT TRUMP EGO DRIVEN AND SAID THAT HE IS UNTETHERED TO
  • TRUTH. THE BOOK WAS COAUTHORED BY
  • CAPTAIN OBVIOUS. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • PRESIDENT TRUMP RESPONDED TO THE CLAIMS IN COMEY'S MEMOIR CALLING
  • HIM A LEAKER AND A LIAR, WHICH COINCIDENTALLY IS ALSO THE NAME
  • OF THE VIDEO THE RUSSIANS HAVE. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • >> ACCORDING TO JAMES COMEY'S MEMOIR PRESIDENT TRUMP DENIED
  • ALLEGATIONS IN THE RUSSIAN DOSSIER SAYING, I'M A
  • GERMOPHOBE, THERE'S NO WAY I WOULD LET PEOPLE PEE ON EACH
  • OTHER AROUND ME. FIRST OF ALL, YOU CAN'T KEEP
  • CALLING YOURSELF A GERMOPHOBE WHEN YOU'RE OUT RAW DOGGING PORN
  • STARS. [ LAUGHTER ]
  • ALSO, PAYING HOOKERS TO PEE ON EACH OTHER WHILE YOU HANG BACK
  • AND WATCH IS EXACTLY SOMETHING A GERMOPHOBE WOULD DO.
  • [ LAUGHTER ] SIDEBAR, AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO
  • THINKS THE PRESIDENT BEING INTO PEEPEE IS, I DON'T KNOW, KIND OF
  • CHARMING? [ LAUGHTER ]
  • YEAH? [ LAUGHTER ]
  • I MEAN, IT'S HUMANIZING. LIKE REMEMBER WHEN WE SAW THAT
  • VIDEO OF OBAMA PLAYING BASKETBALL?
  • WE WERE LIKE, "WOW, HE'S JUST LIKE US."
  • WELL, SAME THING, BUT LIKE TIMES TWO.
  • [ LAUGHTER ]

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Description

Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, including the FBI raiding the home, office and hotel of Michael Cohen, President Donald Trump's lawyer.

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Keywords

SNL Saturday Night Live SNL Season 43 SNL Episode 1743 John Mulaney Weekend Update Colin Jost Michael Che s43 s43e18 episode 18 live new york comedy sketch funny hilarious late night host music guest laugh impersonation actor improv musician comedian stand up stand up comedian netflix KID GORGEOUS The Top Part New in Town The Comeback Kid Jack White the White Stripes third man records Boarding House Reach Lazaretto Blunderbuss

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