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Video Speeding Ticket
07:53   |   today at 08:51


  • this video has been brought to you by
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  • comm / stomachs for 66% off a two-year
  • plan with all of the videos I've made
  • about driving and my complaints about
  • other people's abilities behind the
  • wheel you'd assume I'm a pretty good
  • driver with no record wrong I am a
  • filthy hypocrite last year I got a
  • ticket for speeding in a school zone
  • which if you didn't know is an automatic
  • fail on your driving test actually
  • looking back I technically wasn't in the
  • school zone yet and I was just trying to
  • keep up with traffic but I'll own up to
  • my ignorance and admit that I didn't
  • realize I was actually going that fast
  • you can tell that specific area is a
  • hotspot for speeders because there's a
  • nice little nest for them Dodge Chargers
  • to perch on I sped past an incognito cop
  • saw the flashing lights in my mirror and
  • after some initial delusion that it
  • wasn't for me no can't possibly be oh
  • wait it is I pulled over now I got my
  • driver's license when I was 21 might
  • seem a little late to some of you
  • because you probably started driving
  • right when you hit puberty I know you
  • don't need to tell me you're probably
  • 511 at the age of 13 and feel the need
  • to remind me that I'm short I know you
  • don't need to tell me but do know that I
  • was a university student who commuted
  • everyday to school in a city where it's
  • a nightmare to drive so the only times I
  • could drive was during my free time on
  • the weekends which was usually
  • non-existent it wasn't worth paying
  • insurance to be an inactive driver but I
  • eventually got a part-time job and
  • decided on getting my g2 soon after my
  • 21st birthday and for the next six years
  • until last year I was never in an
  • accident nor ticketed for vehicular
  • misconduct and then I went 80 in a
  • school zone which is an unacceptable
  • amount to pass the 40 kilometer per hour
  • limit as competent of a driver as I
  • believed to be I probably deserved that
  • ticket the cop gave me the whole do you
  • know how fast you were going spiel and I
  • was nothing but cooperative in the
  • conversation officer I was going so fast
  • that you're not even speaking to me this
  • just my afterimage he asked for my
  • license insurance policy and proof of
  • ownership cool here's my license and my
  • insurance policy and let me just get my
  • other document from the the empty glove
  • compartment why are my documents not
  • here oh yeah that's right I recently got
  • my car detailed and took everything out
  • and forgot to put it back in sir are you
  • aware that your policy expired a month
  • ago No please remain in your car the
  • police officer went back inside his car
  • for a few minutes I assume he went to
  • check my records and then he returned to
  • my car he saw that my record was clean
  • and decided to cut me some slack I
  • understand this is your first offense
  • but I'm still gonna have to ticket you
  • for speeding but I'll only mark you for
  • going ten over all right
  • I can waive your other charges if you
  • can provide those documents in court
  • you'll be contacted for an appointed
  • date Thank You officer I'd really
  • appreciate it all right you have a good
  • day sir oh okay I maintained a 10
  • kilometer per hour speed below the limit
  • for the next few weeks the next day I
  • immediately went to go pay the speeding
  • ticket and then I got my documents
  • together for the court hearing that was
  • scheduled four months later and so I
  • waited for the day to arrive as it
  • approached I remember working on a video
  • deadline and staying up late one night
  • the court hearing was the next day at
  • 10:00 a.m. and I remember contemplating
  • whether to just stay awake for a few
  • more hours until then I spent too long
  • thinking about it that I was already on
  • that path but somehow I didn't make it
  • for 10 a.m. I didn't make it to 11 in
  • fact I didn't even wake up at noon I
  • somehow fell asleep and woke up at 4:00
  • p.m. holy Sh I jumped up from my bed so
  • violently that I ended up on the roof of
  • my condo building I didn't know what to
  • do I looked up the number for the
  • courthouse and called
  • voicemail said they were closed I
  • checked our hours to call the next day
  • they were closed on weekends huh my
  • girth
  • I remember reading in the letter or
  • somewhere that if you are absent without
  • informing the court prior to the date
  • the judge can issue a warrant for your
  • arrest and I know it was just a speeding
  • ticket with failure to provide some
  • documents but I panicked I called 9-1-1
  • hello what is your emergency
  • hi this this isn't an emergency I I just
  • wasn't sure what number to call someone
  • probably got murdered because I occupied
  • the line I explained my situation and
  • although I could feel how much of an
  • idiot she thought I was she was helpful
  • and explained my options which were
  • nothing I simply had to wait for Monday
  • to call the court again and when I did I
  • was informed that not only was I absent
  • but so was the officer that ticketed me
  • and I believed my charges would have
  • been waived if I was just there but
  • because we both weren't they rescheduled
  • the hearing and you bet your gas hole I
  • didn't sleep in that time they usually
  • group a couple hearings together because
  • many are short and get resolved quickly
  • the person in line in front of me turned
  • around and did a double-take are you
  • dumb exceedance place for a fan to
  • recognize me I could probably just lie
  • yeah that's me I'm just here for a
  • speeding ticket how about you I ran a
  • red light and killed a family I'm just
  • kidding but I remember it being more
  • serious than a speeding ticket anyway
  • the police officer that ticketed me came
  • into the room and approached me he
  • seemed almost hospitable with what he
  • told me to do and say once my name was
  • called up and assured me that I'd be
  • okay
  • I mean I knew my offense wasn't that
  • serious but he kind of seemed like a bro
  • for making sure things went smoothly I
  • don't know maybe it was just me well mr.
  • papania bob that sounds awfully close to
  • a butchering of my last name I sure hope
  • someone in here is actually named at
  • Punja Bob I guess that's a no nobody
  • here okay yeah that's me
  • man I'm really glad that cop cut me some
  • slack
  • but you know who wouldn't be as nice
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  • [Music]

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