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Video Cashier
06:39   |   12/11/2018 at 18:32


  • - Hi there! - Hello
  • - Did you find everything, okay? - Mm-hmm, actually, um, do you guys not have frozen flakes?
  • No, I guess not
  • Oh. Well, then I guess I didn't find everything okay...
  • But it's okay
  • How unfortunate...
  • But lucky you, this item is actually on sale right now!
  • It's two for $8 or four for $16 or eight for $32 and so on and so forth
  • Wait four for 16...32...
  • I don't think it was necessary for you to say the last two options
  • Well one box costs $5, if you bought four you would save...
  • $4!
  • Nothing unnecessary about saving some money
  • - Never mind, just the one box, please. - Alrighty, with tax that'll be $5.65
  • - Would you like to donate five dollars to the Sick Raccoon Foundation? - Oh no thank you,
  • - I donated yesterday. - Doesn't mean you can't donate again today
  • - Charity doesn't have a quota - I agree, but I'm good. Thank you
  • Do you have something against raccoons?
  • No, I never said that
  • I know you are what you eat, but just because raccoons eat garbage, doesn't mean they are garbage, okay?
  • - I just wanted cereal - How about three dollars? Little Ricky could really use your help
  • look at him, so cute
  • I don't know he looks pretty okay to me...
  • Well, that's where you're wrong
  • He doesn't look, he can't. Because he's blind. Because you haven't donated today.
  • Do you guys not have self checkout yet?
  • All right, sir. How about one dollar?
  • You could spare one dollar, can't you? One dollar so Ricky can see his dying mother one last time.
  • (By the way, his mother is also blind)
  • You're telling me raccoon eye transplants really only cost a dollar?
  • Sir, I saw you park that nice sports car earlier. I'm sure you won't miss one dollar
  • I WALKED here!
  • Four quarters
  • That's still a dollar
  • Okay, then would you be interested in buying one of our cookies?
  • Hand baked by our local Girl Scouts, whom are also sick, blind,
  • deaf, and can't feel... - Can't feel? How do they bake them then?
  • But are blessed enough to use the proceeds
  • towards helping sick raccoons!
  • Fine, okay, I'll take a cookie! how much?
  • It's one for 4 dollars, two for 8 dollars, four for 16 dollars and so on and so forth!
  • I'll take one
  • Ah bless your soul. Trust that your generosity will help Ricky experience life to the fullest!
  • ...Of course until his kidney fails...
  • - Are you serious? - Just like his mother
  • - I'll donate $20. - Oh, thank you! Thank you! Very much appreciated.
  • Would you happen to also be interested in signing up for our credit card?
  • It costs $0 and you'll get $50 off your next purchase
  • Actually, you know what? I can cancel this transaction and you can use the card towards this purchase
  • It'll only take one to forty-five minutes, is that okay?
  • I- I just want my cereal.
  • Okay, I went ahead and canceled the transaction
  • HUH?
  • Here you go! I took the liberty of filling out the rest of your info
  • I just need your signature [WHAT, HOW?] here,
  • here, here, here, [How do you know my information!]
  • and I'm gonna need a witness here. You can probably just ask the gentleman behind you.
  • Hey, you want to hurry up over there? My bananas are melting.
  • (annoyed sigh) Okay, whatever
  • Okay, so the cereal and a $20 donation
  • With your $50 off, you now have $24 and 35¢ left in credit for this transaction
  • Would you like to donate the rest to the Sick Raccoons Foundation and help approximately twenty-four raccoons see again?
  • Why are all these raccoons blind?! And can't I just keep the credit and use it another time?!
  • When you're not working?
  • - God! - Not unless you sign up for our rewards program
  • which I've already filled out for you
  • (I used your info from the credit card application) - HOW did you get my information?!
  • And while I was at it,
  • I also signed you up for the army, co-signed us a lease for my new condo, registered you as an organ donor,
  • adopted three foster children for you and elected you as vice president of my son's anime club.
  • Will that be all today?
  • - Can I speak with your manager, please? - Oh, I am the manager, sir
  • Kerstin Wart, nice to meet you. I also happen to be the owner of this franchise.
  • MalWart!
  • What would you like to speak to me about?
  • *internal monologue*
  • [I just wanted cereal.] Cashier: Sir?
  • [I just wanted to have a nice bowl of cereal] Cashier: Sir, do you have something to say?
  • [You guys didn't even have the one I like] Cashier: Sir?
  • Cashier: Sir are you still there?
  • [And now I have three children]
  • Cashier: I also subscribed you to Raccoons Weekly
  • [Now I have to share my cereal with them] Cashier: hello?
  • I know a lot of you guys do your shopping online,
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  • making them crisp and outstanding, almost like you're hearing it performed live,
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  • I don't really consider myself an audiophile, but I do consider these to be of high quality
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  • While Massdrop has a big focus on audio,
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  • Enjoy!

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If you’re curious to see how high-end audio sounds for only $150, check out to get your hands on a pair of the Sennheiser HD58X headphones. For a limited time, first-time Massdrop users can save an additional $10!

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